Don't Nurture a Hell Fire Within Your Soul. Instead, Keep It Real!
To have ones heart metaphorically ripped from ones body many a time can lead to ones observation of a hell fire within their soul. A fire keeps burning, so long as someone continues to place fuel on that fire, does it not?
To channel this fire into something much more positive, I choose to observe how things make me feel. I put myself in charge of my own mental health. I then give myself permission to step boldly away from anything that might make the hell fire run hot within my soul.
And I very consciously choose to hold the world in my hands, and shape it to my liking. Not everyone realises they can do that. I have realised that I cannot personally go backwards; I am not built that way – I can only go forwards. I choose to move in a way that is soothing to my soul.
As we shift away from the hell fire, we start to realise that we always had a choice as to how we channeled this fire.
I used to consistently hang so tightly to what was. So many hours wasted, worrying about a loss before I lost it. At some point I started to release my death grip on my desires, only to find myself out in the wildness. Looking back I recognise that I found peace within that same wildnerness that I was at first so fearful of. And it was the wilderness that allowed for me to reset, and then upgrade my life to something so much better.
That's not to say that you should try to put yourself in the wilderness, but I think many of us are insecure about and hold a deep fear of ending up in the wilderness.
In many situations I felt like a puppet. I was offered a certain amount of space to be me – but I found myself attached to certain conditions. How kind. I knew that if I wanted to stay it meant fitting into realms of whom I was told I must be. The alternative being to cause friction between myself and the other.
To either conform, or to cause what I deem to be unnecessary friction both go against the grain of my very existence. I always prefer to be kind, but I am also very passionate about being authentically me.
Who am I to be? What is right and good? For decades these questions were dangled like a carrot in front of me. Over time such questions made their way into my soul – and started to burn like some sort of hell fire. I am semi-amused at this point that I spent so much time nurturing this dark hell fire that burned within me.
If I am to do what another person considers to be right and good, is it actually right and good, or does that person filter their perception through some sort of lens? Might it be an impossible task to do what is considered right and good for all?
An example of this is within my writing. My words. They simmer in my truth, yet could they potentially hurt another? At the same time, they might help heal a person who has gone through something similar… plus letting my words flow is very healing for me personally.
I am not a person who can put my words in a box; and place it in some dark corner in the storage room. I will never be that person.
I have tried to journal privately a number of times, but it never seemed to work for me. I’m all about working smarter, not harder – and to journal privately leans into this thought that I am wasting valuable energy. That might sound strange, but it is MY truth.
As such, I choose instead to publicly put my thoughts on screen, then share them.
This is me. It helps me gather my thoughts together and extract some sort of meaning from my thoughts. I heal and grow MY way, not yours. Finding peace and radical self-acceptance within who we are and how we show up, is an extremely powerful thing.
Just because I live my life this way, doesn’t mean it’s right for the next person. We all need to figure out what is the perfect recipe for our life. The best way to do this is to learn to go with the flow of who we feel we are at our core and combine that with who we personally hope to be.
We cannot find the perfect recipe for life unless we are willing to take some form of action. It requires a willingness to dip our toe in and test the water, so to speak.
Here and there I have dipped my toe in really funky steaming hot sewerage type water. Eww. Lol. But I’ve learned to see things as they are... and do the f$ck no dance if anything tries to reignite that hell fire within.
I have totally totally created a f$ck no dance... don't question my antics! Shhhh. Haha. You may or may not be offered the privilege to see it. This all depends whether I choose to let you into my soul.
It's important to realise that we can be kind and set healthy boundaries for ourselves at the same time. Sometimes its better to stay and try to figure it out. It all depends on whether the other has chosen to put in the work. Every single one of us becomes the shadow walker, at the point that we are required to work through a conflict, or even worse – put out that hell fire within.
Thank you for going on this journey with me today. Hopefully you have managed to grab something useful from my words that help you along your own journey. I wish you so many blessings both for today and for all your tomorrows
~ Rachel Reeves
This content is created by Rachel Reeves, who has always been a deep thinker. She previously played the supporting role in the lives of those around her, and very much held back on sharing this gift fully with other's. This is Rachel stepping very much out of her comfort zone, into what she now knows to be her inner calling, and sharing her thoughts with the world.
This video and article is intended to support self-growth, but the information provided is to be taken as personal opinion only. Feel free to take what resonates, but use your own inner-wisdom and guidance when doing so -- you know yourself much better than anybody else ever will. The information provided is to be in no way regarded as Medical, Legal, or Financial Advice. Please seek professional advice where needed. Thank you.
Who are you? What is right and good for you? Lean into that. One could waste a lifetime nurturing a hell fire within their soul, that constantly questions their authenticity and truth based on other people's opinions and belief systems. Or they can get real!
~ Rachel Reeves ~